The Ultimate Summer Movie…Unfortunately

I’ve been wondering which of this summer’s moronic, eye-candy popcorn flicks will be crowned the big dumb event of the season.  Will it be X-Men Origins: Wolverine, Terminator: Salvation, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, or G.I. Joe: Rise of the Cobra?  (And when did colons and subtitles become standard fare for these special effects extravaganzas?  What, are they too mature and artsy for X-Men 4, Terminator 4, Transformers 2, or just plain old G.I. Joe?) 

But voting will not be necessary.  We have declared a winner.  Not that I have, will, or even have any desire to see any of these movies, there is no doubt in my mind that the worst movie of the summer is this direct-to-video abomination.  How could it not be, when it features the ever so slightly less than stellar acting chops of Lorenzo Lamas and 80’s teen sensation Debbie “Electric Youth” Gibson? 

*sigh*  Maybe they’ll be so bad they’ll be watchable for the laughs.  But is it really a good thing that our big summer event movies revolve around empty computer graphics and the hope that they might be so bad that we’ll remember them like Plan 9 From Outer Space?

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