How the Bloggernacle Apparently Watches General Conference

Imagine a general conference that hypothetically includes a discussion between the general authorities delivering the addresses, and “the bloggernacle”  as an entity hearing them.

GA: Church members should be loyal to the church.
B: Absolutely. Church members should definitely focus on minor doubts that are only tangential to the major tenets of faith and discipleship, and use them to publicly undermine the church.

GA: What? No, that’s not at all what we said. Church members should be visibly loyal to the church, striving to be part of the mainstream body of belief and service.
B: Yes! Finally, someone came out and said it. Church members need to be encouraged in striking out on their own and forging their own path to salvation, whatever that means for them.

GA: Wow, that’s not even close. OK, I’ll try again. It’s really quite simple: people who belong to a group based on belief in certain doctrines should actually believe in those doctrines, and act accordingly.
B: Dude, now you’re speaking my language. The gospel is a wonderful, subjective mystery that we all need to wrestle with and interpret. When our inclinations clash with those of the church, we need to publicly advocate for the church to get with it.

GA: Seriously? You really think that’s what we’re saying here? This degree of disconnect is mind-boggling. Here, let me try an experiment: “The sky is blue.”
B: Thank you! Sheesh, I’ve been trying to convince my friends for years that the sky is orange. At last, a conference talk that backs me up in what I’m doing!

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