I used to love getting a big, gross, cold shake at any fast food place–a thick, syrupy monster of cheap chocolatey slop. But these days they seem to be even more rare than a competent fielder on the Brewers.
First I noticed Jack in the Box make the transition. The big beloved cardboard cups were swapped out for little Starbucks-like plastic cups, and half the shake was now just whipped cream. Then McDonalds–McDonalds! Home of the crappiest and most wonderful shakes in the world!–followed suit. Now I don’t know who even carries big old fake shakes any more. Burger King? Del Taco? *shudder* Arby’s? Yes, I would even go there.
This may well be the most petty thing I’ve ever ranted about, but I can’t impress upon you seriously enough the intensity of my emotion about this. I loved those nasty old things, and I cannot stand how much I loathe their inferior replacements. I can’t wait for our dumb society to get over this infatuation with dainty desserts so maybe I can go back to slurping down those enormous cartons of gooey, gluey, toxic frozen sludge. A piece of our heritage is gone, people.