I’ve always said this: teachers don’t leave because of bad pay, they leave because of poor working conditions.
I suspect I find this funny for reasons other than those the artist had:
LANGUAGE AND LITERATURE
Gioia’s intro to Finnegans Wake
Fun parkour video.
I’m a sucker for great astronomy photography.
Beautiful photo of contrasts.
Sunset AND a castle? Wow!
Here’s a chart I found online with some good productivity ideas:
POLITICS AND SOCIETY
“Ten Ways Mormons Can Celebrate Independence Day” Good advice for all of us, for every day.
Great essay about defining conservatism–required reading for all poli-sci wonks.
On conservative literature–a good start.
The complicated politics of Shakespeare.
On ostensibly conservative college students being intellectually stunted:
“They cannot think with a conservative worldview because they have had limited exposure to conservative values. Children spend thirteen years in a school system which was founded upon progressive ideals about education and which increasingly promotes statism. For eighteen years the entertainment industry communicated to them an equally progressive worldview. From all sides children are taught to believe in the inherent goodness of humankind and to cherish the values of tolerance and diversity. There is no good and evil; there is just diversity. There is no justice and truth; there is only tolerance for other opinions. Democracy has become a good in its own right instead of being founded upon virtue. When democracy becomes its own end, any atrocity can be justified by a majority vote.”
Great comment on an Instapundit link about politically biased professors:
I noticed that back when I was in university: the liberal students were so used to everyone around them validating their opinions that they didn’t learn to make good arguments; the conservative students knew they needed good arguments, so they learned to make them,
The unfortunate part comes when these liberal students go through many years of schooling, get loads of validation for twittering about the talking point of the day, and then turn into incredulous, raging jerks when an adult conservative makes a point contrary to their ideology.
Probably the single coolest phrase in all of scripture, right there. In Doctrine and Covenants 123, Joseph Smith encouraged the Latter-day Saints to keep track of all the “libelous publications,” as well as property damage and physical abuse, they had suffered.
Verse 5 uses this unique and memorable phrase to summarize that record: “the whole concatenation of diabolical rascality.” Isn’t it wonderful?
First of all, it’s funny in the way that wordy phrases are, using multiple long, obscure words right next to each other. Also, it’s a perfect example of that 19th century style of excruciatingly exact wording. The individual words themselves are quite funny, too. “Concatenation.” Just say that one aloud.
Everybody should definitely highlight this phrase in their own copies right away.
And if you haven’t read the Doctrine and Covenants, you really should. Who wouldn’t want to read a book that has gems like this in it?
Probably has to be the cabin scene from the Marx brothers’ 1935 masterpiece, A Night at the Opera:
A classic. I remember Patrick Stewart doing this bit as a guest host once, but I can’t find the clip. Still…
Adjacent to this hospital is a medical office building, thus this sign. Still…Vegas, baby!
As the father of seven children, I’ve had to clean up a lot of gross stuff over the years. I’ve only been peed on twice, and both times were my own dumb fault–I shouldn’t have been so slow with the transition while changing a diaper.
Still, what happened Monday takes the cake.
Our new daughter was one day old, and I was changing her diaper.
She had just gotten some work done at the hospital, and had a bandage on her heel where they drew blood. As I started, it came off and she bled on me. I put a new band-aid on.
I took off the old diaper and she promptly peed on me, and her clothes, and the blanket. I got the old diaper back under there to get as much as I could.
Some teachers may say that the canon of classics is obsolete. They may say that basic things aren’t as important as creativity. They might degrade the value of memorizing facts.
But if you’re a college student and you go on Wheel of Fortune and pronounce “Achilles” incorrectly, millions of people will laugh at you.
Great satire from early 80’s-era Black Flag. Even better than the social commentary is the reminder of what was popular 30 years ago (“That’s Incredible! Hill Street Blues! Dallas!”).
When revising writing that I’ve labelled “awkward,” students have a tendency to practice what I call “sideways editing.” Instead of swapping out their initial phraseology for something more fluently developed, they rearrange the existing parts into an equally awkward sequel.
Here’s an example that I now use as an illustration in class:
First draft: The article had good ideas in it and related them to us good.
is not substantially improved as
Second draft: The article’s ideas were good and they were related to the readers in good ways too.
- This One Weird Story Actually Makes Sense Out of Everything–Amazing!
- Such Drama in This Rich, Dysfunctional Family That Threw It All Away
- A Politician Who Really Cares About The People? What?!
- One Man Stands Alone Against a Whole Society–So Inspiring!
- 50 Questions That Will Rock Your World–#30 Took My Breath Away
- This Guy Has The Ultimate Secrets of Success in Work–Here They Are!
- 5 Simple Steps To Find Out That God Is Real! Wow! Really Works!
- This Normal Slacker Went From Zero to Hero–The Big Difference Is Right in the Middle!
- Read This True Story About Children and Angels and Try Not to Cry!
- One Awesome Challenge That Promises a Miracle! Changes You Forever!
How to be a droll troll: say “That’s what she said!” immediately after any female ever says anything.
Go to Instapundit. Scroll down a few screens and on the right you’ll see the search box. Search for the phrase, “They told me if.”
Enjoy one of the Internet’s best running gags.
Teachers: “It’s 3 A.M. and I’ve thrown up five times. Maybe I should call in sick? But the juniors have that big project due today, and I want to be sure I hold them to it. Besides, a lot of them worked really hard and they want me to see their final product. And I have two parent conferences I need to be there for. And if I stay home sick, I’ll just have to go in for a bit anyway, because I’ll have to switch out half the materials for 3rd and 4th period for stuff the sub will be able to use. And I have three kids coming in for detention today–no way do they get off the hook! Plus, I’m doing my favorite lesson of the quarter with the sophomores and I don’t want to miss that, or push it back, or have a sub messing that up. …Oh! And I wanted to talk to those guys in 1st period about the game yesterday! *sigh* I’ll just go in. It’s too much hassle to take a day off.”
Students: “*Achoo!* Sweet! I have the sniffles. I’m gonna take a week off!”
A “Baned” book would be in much worse shape than a banned book.
Last week I saw a student open a paperback in that painful way that so many people do; the pages he’d already read were folded all the way around so that the front cover touched the back cover.
As he started reading, I said, “Dude, that book’s Batman and you’re pulling a Bane on him!” The student immediately got the reference and let the book go from this contorted death grip.
Scroll down for an explanation of the joke!